A visit to Mount Hayes reveals a facility that operates at subzero temperatures while keeping top-secret information and potential alien life.

Glarnok and Moozart Visit Earth’s Worst-Kept Secret

So... There's an Alleged Alien Base in Alaska. Again.

Ah yes, Alaska. Land of snow, salmon, and suspiciously frequent disappearances.

The peak of Mount Hayes located in the “Alaskan Triangle” region has captured public attention because people speculate about an alien base operating at the summit.

That’s right. A base. As in, extraterrestrials with real estate. Possibly with a lava lamp budget and questionable Wi-Fi.

This information stems from CIA documents alongside remote viewing psychic experiences and numerous eyewitness accounts that generate nonstop discussions on Reddit. Glarnok the Alien along with Moozart the Cow (an abductee and space philosopher who loves snacks) were sent by us to offer their expert opinions despite being the least qualified for the task.

The Alaskan Triangle: Because the Bermuda One Wasn’t Confusing Enough

The Alaskan Triangle forms a region which joins Juneau with Anchorage and Utqiagvik (that's a mouthful for human lips). This area gains its notoriety from consuming hikers together with planes and occasional groups of visitors before leaving no signs of their existence.

More than 20,000 people have vanished without clear explanations in this region. Bears? Maybe. Government experiments? Possibly. Vortexes to another realm where socks and common sense go to die? Also on the table.

CIA Files, Psychic Spies, and a Mountain with Trust Issues

The declassified CIA documents from Project STARGATE reveal information about Mount Hayes despite being part of a real Cold War program that employed adults to gaze at walls and report things like base locations and snack availability.

Glarnok comments that secrecy about this issue was never attempted according to him while gazing at Google Earth. You pixelate a few UFOs and Earthlings start solving national security with free apps and an internet connection.

👽 Glarnok's Icy Review: ★☆☆☆☆

Mount Hayes? Oh yes. Lovely views. Great for abductions. Terrible parking.

A hypothetical base constructed in this location would be situated in Alaska because of its three favorable aspects: frigid climate, sparse population distribution and public fascination with reindeer that prevents inquiry.

But now? You’ve got ex-security guards on TV, YouTubers zooming into shadows, and TikTok psychics going viral for ‘feeling weird about the snow.’ The secrecy of this supposed base appears to be its biggest failure since it fails to stay hidden from view.”

Also, the orbs splitting into three? Classic decoy maneuver. Very 1990s. We’ve upgraded since then. Just saying.

 Moozart’s Moosings: The Cow Has Questions

Look, I’m not saying there’s definitely an alien base under Mount Hayes. Every time I spot a glowing orb in Alaska I wish I had dollar bills to buy my own tractor.

The CIA distributes declassified documents without restraint as multiple people vanish and flying objects become common while people maintain their false sense of shock. Meanwhile, everyone’s acting surprised.

The ‘psychic’ who detected the base has become a major point of controversy in this matter. I once detected a cheeseburger from 12 miles away, no government grant required.”

He paused to moo judgmentally at the sky.

The Bigger Picture (and Possibly the Bigger Craft)

The public excitement about Mount Hayes represents a small portion of an extensive network of hidden information that exists beneath the snow.

The UFO sighting of Japan Airlines Flight 1628 involved an unidentified object that was reported to be as large as three aircraft carriers.

Redditors continue to share pictures of ‘triangular structures’ which appear on Google Maps.

The History Channel has now produced its 17th special which asks “ALIENS: Probably Yes?”

And still, skeptics say: “It’s probably just weather balloons.”

The Alien Abduction Lamp Perspective

At Alien Abduction Lamp we handle these matters with full seriousness. Mostly. Sort of. Not really.

A glowing orb which divides into three in the heart of Alaska prompts our organization to act.

A Tuesday.

A mild atmospheric disturbance.

A rookie pilot who is trying to master the reverse park maneuver in their scout ship.

But a base? A full-on subterranean complex hidden inside a mountain with mysterious electromagnetic interference, psychic validation, and a decades-long string of disappearances?

Now that’s something we can get behind.

Especially if there’s room for mood lighting.

Final Thoughts from the Frozen Fringe

“If we wanted you to find the base, we’d put up a sign. You’re welcome for the mystery.”
 Glarnok

“I just want to know if the gift shop sells hoodies.”
 Moozart

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